About six weeks ago I received our church’s Virginia Grantham Service Award. I was deeply touched, particularly by the incredible generosity with which it was given. I forget what our wonderful Board President, Ginger Brown, said, but I know it involved my web work and some other more difficult tasks I’ve had to do at church over the years.

Then consider the person the award is named after. Virginia is one of my heroines – a long-time (50 year?) member of the church, who has served steadfastly with kindness and humility. A minister once said Virginia is an angel. It makes sense to me. I think everybody loves her, probably because she loves everybody. She’s our church’s equivalent of a national treasure, so to have an award with her name on it? I shake my head in wonder.

And yet…. I have such reservations about awards at church. While it means the earth to me, still I question the wisdom of this practice. I know that people are hurt when their work is overlooked. It’s not that they are jealous of the people receiving the award. To the contrary — they’re happy for them. (At least that’s the case for those I talk with.) It’s more that it can affirm in one more way what they already were guessing – that their contribution is not valued. From what I know, our most valuable behind-the-scenes workers are particularly at risk when awards are being given.

I hear there are other faith traditions where volunteers aren’t even told thank you and that’s okay. I’m not sure how this works, but I think it has to do with an understanding that God sees, and your work is done for God. I love this approach, although I’m certain it wouldn’t work in Unitarian Universalist congregations.

Would that there were some way appreciation could be given in just the right amount – not too little as is so often the case, but not too much either. I don’t know what that would look like, and I don’t know how a church can extricate itself gracefully from giving awards. Do you?